A few weeks ago, I sent this encouragement to a stranger over the internet. I have decided to post it here as well.
Are you familiar with the story of Moses and the Children of Israel? They were wandering in the wilderness and the Lord provided them with food – straight from heaven – that the Israelites would gather every day. They called it “Manna” which literally means “What is it?” I think that name is hilarious, but it has also come to be very meaningful to me. A few years ago I listened to a talk by Elder Todd Christofferson. He shared a story about a struggle he had been through and though he desperately wanted the problem to be solved by God, he gradually learned to ask for daily bread, or in other words, manna. He learned that the miracle God was willing to give him was what he needed for that day. There was still a lot of uncertainty, but he could trust that if he acted in faith that day with what he’d been given, the next day more manna would be supplied. That is the background for this comment which refers to manna.
I am so sorry that life is so difficult and dark right now. I know in my darkest times what I wanted desperately is rescue, but often I would feel the question “He may not be willing to take it all from you because He knows what’s best for you, but what is a little miracle he may be willing to grant you right now?” For me, one night, that was the miracle of being able to fall asleep, which I felt I needed so badly- and that was my “manna” for then. I knew I would need more, but I was able to get the sleep I needed to try again the next day. I hated the fact that I was not helped in the way I wanted to be helped during the hardest times, but I can look back and see what he offered was what I needed most- it was the gift of “the Peace that Passeth all Understanding”- it would come in moments- not all the time; but those moments got me through until the next time. And gradually helped me figure out how to slow down and accept His timing. It sounds like you are in the fight of your life- you’re not alone!!! Angels on both sides of the veil are there to help and strengthen you, and though it’s not pleasant, we came here to develop the things you are in the middle of developing, even though it’s hard to see that it’s going in a positive direction. Hold on to hope and keep reaching for the Savior- he knows exactly what you need and will be there to help you through it all, even when you can’t feel Him there. Sending hugs!!!!